All Zombieland Rules

Can you help us fill in the missing rules of Zombieland?

Zombieland Rules from the movie & promotional material

#1 – Cardio
#2 – The Double Tap
#3 – Beware of Bathrooms
#4 – Seatbelts
#5 – ???
#6 – The Skillet*
#7 – Travel Light
#8 – Get A Kickass Partner*
#9 – ???
#10 – ???
#11 – ???
#12 – Bounty Paper Towels*
#13 – ???
#14 – ???
#15 – Bowling Ball*
#16 – ???
#17 – Don’t Be A Hero
#18 – Limber Up
#19 – ???
#20 – ???
#21 – Avoid Strip Clubs*
#22 – When In Doubt, Know Your Way Out
#23 – ???
#24 – ???
#25 – ???
#26 – ???
#27 – ???
#28 – ???
#29 – The Buddy System*
#30 – ???
#31 – Check The Back Seat
#32 – Enjoy The Little Things
#33 – Swiss Army Knife*

*Rules marked with an asterisk are from promotional material and should not yet be considered canon.

Zombieland Deleted Scenes Rules

#2 – The Ziploc Bag

Zombieland Rules from interviews with cast and crew

4 new rules have been mentioned by the writers Paul Wernick and Rhett Reese but they don’t have numbers associated with them.
#??? – Always carry a change of underwear
#??? – Double-knot your shoe[lace]s
#??? – It’s a marathon, not a sprint. Unless it is a sprint, then sprint
#??? – Pack your stain stick

Zombieland Rules from the cellphone game

#2 – Zipplock
#3 – Double Tap
#5 – Shoot First
#7 – Incoming!
#8 – Break it up
#9 – With your bare hands
#10 – Don’t swing low
#11 – Use your feet
#13 – Shake it off
#22 – Opportunity knocks
#24 – Use your thumbs

702 Responses to “All Zombieland Rules”

  1. william sweatland says:

    dont get scared people please respon

  2. kikass says:

    i have some rules that i want to see in the list
    RULE#? WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE
    RULE#? USE ALL SENSES
    RULE#? DEAD EYE
    RULE#? SAVE A BULLET FOR YOURSELF

  3. wichitah says:

    get a gun/or any weapon and learn how to use it

    check the bodys for stuff

    when you have free time have sex

    always have a lookout

    build a armored car with weapons attached to it

  4. wichitah says:

    get a gun/weapon and learn how to use it

    chek bodys for cool stuff

    walky talkys

    CARS!!!!!

    save the human race

    if possible make an armored car

  5. wichitah says:

    get food

  6. Phoenex68 says:

    Shoot First, Ask questions Later.

  7. SFH says:

    BITCHWA

  8. Rob says:

    -Stay put for the first 48 hrs!
    -Go North remember zombies are flesh too, they can freeze
    -Just ask anyway,”Are you bit?”
    -Don’t be a nigger
    -Don’t trust me
    -Save a bullet for yourself
    -Run faster
    -Sometimes you’ll have to spray and pray

  9. Zombie 5k says:

    […] All Zombieland Rules – ZombielandRules.com http://www.kezerphotography.com "The current World Champion is not a happy bunny at the […]

  10. kris says:

    the only important rule!!
    -its gonna be a long trip, brink LOTS of twinkies
    ^_^

  11. Zac says:

    You’re forgetting a big key rule that has played a big role in any zombie movie…HEADSHOTS, blows to the head, stuff like that!!!

  12. Tallahassee says:

    Find a god damn Twinkie cause this Twinkie thang it ain’t over yet

  13. loloah says:

    i need to know all zombie rules just in case there is a zombie acopalyse!!! i mean come on, i rewatched the first movie millions of times to write downn all the rules, hopefully they finish off the rule list in the second movie. now i need a Twinkie… >:P ggrrrrr.

  14. Pudge says:

    *The bigger the better… Referring to guns and vehicles
    *Avoid the Bull Murray… Pretending to be a zombie to scare someone.
    *Breathe before you squeeze… The exhale before you pulll the trigger.

  15. california says:

    ive been u.s. miltary infantry for 8 yrs now all i got to say is big guns armored trucks mre’s and water when the apcolypse goes down raid a military base ! you cant go wrong there trust me its loaded with everything you will need

  16. maurice tillman says:

    Stay away from hospitals, malls, the Army, and the police! The police are already dead and the military will have orders to kill you!

    As for the rule of big guns, they are loud, heavy, and do more harm than good…They draw attention and make you tired as heck! If you have to, pack nothing larger than an M-16…

  17. Drizzt De Wolf says:

    I agree with maurice tillman. stay away from malls, hospitals, police station, and the military.

    Go up north to like washington were there is alot of game and open feilds to withhold a good defence system and have a lookout.

    And always have someone with a heavy rifle with a big clip to cover yall while yall reload.

    noise dont matter aslong as you no what you are doing. And stock up on ammo and food and never drink from a river and stay away from pests and mosquitos.

  18. Drizzt De Wolf says:

    111 1010 1011 10101 101 11011 1011 10100

  19. Jedi Thug says:

    One Word: MACHETE!!! (Una Palabra: MACHETE)

  20. Jedi Thug says:

    Another bit of advice; zombies teeth cant peirce steel or kevlar so stock up on kevlar onesies (if they exsist, if not then make some) & get or make a sheild to go with your MACHETE!!!

  21. Jedi Thug says:

    i misspelled shield. i’m sorry

  22. aidan says:

    Cardio
    The Double Tap
    Beware of Bathrooms
    Wear Seat Belts
    No Attachments
    The “Skillet”
    Travel Light
    Get a Kick Ass Partner
    With your Bare Hands
    Don’t Swing Low
    Use Your Foot
    Bounty Paper Towels
    Shake it Off
    Always carry a change of underwear
    Bowling Ball
    Opportunity Knocks
    Don’t be a hero (later crossed out to be a hero)
    Limber Up
    Break it Up
    It’s a marathon, not a sprint, unless it’s a sprint, then sprint
    Avoid Strip Clubs
    When in doubt Know your way out
    Zipplock
    Use your thumbs
    Shoot First
    A little sun screen never hurt anybody
    Incoming!
    Double-Knot your Shoes
    The Buddy System
    Pack your stain stick
    Check the back seat
    Enjoy the little things
    Swiss army Knife

  23. aidan says:

    get a big truck and lots of non enfected people and give em guns and of you go

  24. payton says:

    get a big truck and lots of non enfected people and give em guns and of you go

  25. Dillon says:

    Baby wipes and toilet paper

  26. Donna says:

    Rule # 30 Show some California hospitality 🙂

  27. ashville says:

    a rule not listed, but should be on the list is:
    Rule #34 Don’t make promises
    Rule #35 Always carry a Zippo

  28. Keith says:

    One thing that I always wondered why no one ever tried in a zombie movie

    Zombies can’t bite through chainmail

  29. Redlands says:

    @Kieth: Chain mail is heavy. You wouldn’t last long,and it heats up in the sun causing nice burns. Oh,it’s also pretty noisy. Kevlar is the ticket.
    Another rule should be: Just because it seems like the best place to hide out doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. Shortened to: Avoid the obvious

  30. KrackheadKookiemonster says:

    Get a kick a** partner
    doubletap
    limber up
    CARDIO(never be a fat B*****)
    when in dobut know your way out
    and…. good luck in Z-land

  31. […] eating out a smarts of anyone who possibly can’t run quick adequate or neglected learning the manners of evading zombies? No, zero so dramatic; those who adjust will strew their aged proceed of life for a new one and […]

  32. fabian says:

    Never say Ill be back cuz you won’t

  33. […] of my favorite zombie movies is Zombieland, which has a long list of rules for survival, shared throughout the film by the main […]

  34. […] of my favorite zombie movies is Zombieland, which has a long list of rules for survival, shared throughout the film by the main […]

  35. […] of my favorite zombie movies is Zombieland, which has a long list of rules for survival, shared throughout the film by the main […]

  36. […] &#959f m&#1091 pet zombie movies &#1110&#1109 Zombieland, wh&#1110&#1089h h&#1072&#1109 a long list &#959f rules f&#959r survival, shared throughout th&#1077 film b&#1091 th&#1077 main […]

  37. […] eating out a smarts of anyone who possibly can’t run quick adequate or neglected learning the manners of evading zombies? No, zero so dramatic; those who adjust will strew their aged proceed of life for a new one and […]

  38. zoinks says:

    Last mag make it count.
    Always take someone who runs slower than you.
    Never trust a fart.
    Wear comfortable boots, you never know when those steel toes may come in handy.

  39. ombie survivalist says:

    rule 1: always carry a knife
    rule 2: improvision is advised
    rule 3: never get into a relationship
    rule 4: there is always someone around the corner
    rule 5: check the back seat
    rule 6: ammo is precious
    rule 7: when being chased you are guarenteed to fall, if female multiply the chances by 3
    rule 8: always leae the car running
    rule 9: sticks and stones may break bones but you cant kill a zombie with insults
    rule 10: NEVER NEVER EVER EVER!!!! CHECK THE SUPPLY SHED! ITS A SUICIDE SHED!!!!

  40. Wise Crack says:

    33. Bring pain killers. Lots. Make sure they don’t rattle though because you’ll either attract unwanted friends or drive yourself insane.

    34. Keep sane. One way is letting out agression by smashing stuff. I suggest bringing a little mp3 and listen to one song a day unless emergency calls for more.

    35. Can’t find a non-flesh eating companion? Get yourself a dog! Animals know stuff before it happens, and dogs have great sense of hearing and smell so they’ll know when someone wants you over for a meal.

    36. Guns are good, bats, staffs, anything with a blade that extends, even better.

    37. Gas does not last forever. So find a place to chill every night or two. Preferably somewhere high.

    38. Becareful around water. Scenior: decide to take a leak with a peaceful lake behind ya. Zombie comes out of the water from his swim. You have your pants down. Talk about shit.

    39. If you’re in a group, know that people are going to move on if you die and still try to survive. I suggest you do the same.

    40. Personal rule of mine here. You get bitten, go out like a badass. Cause come on, killing some more zombies for fellow surviors is not a bad idea.

  41. Mohawk Warrior says:

    Rule 1: Bigger does not mean better – .22 are light weight and accurate. Why carry 1 box of 12 gauge when 20 boxes of .22 weight the same.

    Rule 2: Friends are important – It is key to have someone to watch your back.

    Rule 3: Public Shelters, Wal-Mart, Military Bases ect. Are not a good place to go. Other people have the same ideas as you( Dawn of the Dead ) so infected and uninfected will race to those places.

    Rule 4: The country side is an ideal place to survive – Low population levels equals less zombies, also farms equal food, guns, and hideouts.

    Rule 5: Never go into a fight unprepared – Always be armed to the gills, side arms, swords, axes, knives, Cast iron skillet, ect ect.

  42. Mohawk Warrior says:

    Rule 1: Bigger does not mean better – .22 are light weight and accurate. Why carry 1 box of 12 gauge when 20 boxes of .22 weight the same.

    Rule 2: Friends are important – It is key to have someone to watch your back.

    Rule 3: Public Shelters, Wal-Mart, Military Bases ect. Are not a good place to go. Other people have the same ideas as you( Dawn of the Dead ) so infected and uninfected will race to those places.

    Rule 4: The country side is an ideal place to survive – Low population levels equals less zombies, also farms equal food, guns, and hideouts.

    Rule 5: Never go into a fight unprepared – Always be armed to the gills, side arms, swords, axes, knives, Cast iron skillet, ect ect….

  43. […] homes, a necessary staple in others. Personally, I like the first few rules laid out in Zombieland (5): 1. Cardio-fatties die first, 2. Double tap-don’t get stingy with your bullets, and 3. Beware […]

  44. @kikass says:

    “When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

  45. vampire chick says:

    I’m loving the Gibbs rules up there! jk!
    Rule 1: ALWAYS carry a gun
    Rule 2: no sympathy. Just because someone is kind and nice with a bite dosen’t mean they are going to stay that way!
    Rule 3: Keep moving. Try not to lingere or get attached.
    Rule 4: Try to always carry some sort of explosives… it might come in handy.
    Rule 5: Sleep during the day if needed. Night is most dangerous.
    Rule 6: Have a companion. Even if it is imaginary, you need to be able to stay sane somehow.. even if it means talking to yourself
    Rule 7: Forget morals! This is survival we’re talking about! Shoot anything that gets in your way or slows you down.
    Rule 8: Try to always have a car around somewhere that is accessible.
    Rule 9: when being chased, don’t stop and hide. Don’t climb if you can’t get down and they can get up! if you have rule 8 you should get out of there fine.
    Rule 10: DON’T DIE! or get bitten for that matter. TOP PRIORITY!!!

  46. zombiesleya001 says:

    rule #5 should be aim for the head in the movie it never says anything about aiming for the head and every good zombie killer knows to go for the head. am i right?

  47. kevin says:

    the most important rule ever.
    don’t die as a virgin.

  48. jake says:

    rule 45 kill them all
    rule 46 use arows
    rule 47 recycle
    rule 48 lazers
    rule 49 snowplow
    rule 50 play lots of call of duty
    rule 51 bazooka
    rule 52 slice and dice
    rule 53 murder ball
    rule 54 chainsaw
    rule 55 meat cannon
    rule 56 get to the safe haven
    rule 57 kill the runner or your a doner
    rule 58 survive
    rule 59 if they talk theyr not dead/yet
    rule 60 jab jab jab
    rule 61 bewear of mc donalds
    rule 62 fast food = fast zombies
    rule 63 if bitten kill your self fast
    rule 64 no bikes
    rule 65 boil your water
    rule 66 door smacker
    rule 67 MOA is dead
    rule 68 get help
    rule 69 man up or be a manwitch
    rule 70 hope for the best
    rule 71 dont get bitten
    rule 72 scratchs = death
    rule 73 follow the rules

  49. jake says:

    rule 74 bag of metal
    rule 75 survive to round 999999999
    rule 76 find armor
    rule 77 its life or death
    rule 78 get zombie killing robot
    rule 79 remember theres a lot of rules
    rule 80 find me
    rule 81 big guns are good guns
    rule 82 watch your back
    rule 83 your mom might be one of the undead
    rule 84 have good health
    rule 85 live free or die a manwitch
    rule 86 school will only kill you
    rule 87 run
    rule 88 hide from zombies
    rule 89 pee buddy
    rule 90 RPG = zombie R.I.P
    rule 91 ray gun
    rule 92 no getting drunk
    rule 93 retards die first
    rule 94 no feeding the zombies
    rule 95 sleap less
    rule 96 zombie dog get no treats
    rule 97 zombies cant jump or fly
    rule 98 call for help
    rule 99 stay safe
    rule 100 kill creativly

  50. jake says:

    rule 0 live
    rule 1 bathrooms are killrooms
    rule 2 dont shower no time to
    rule 3 dont be food
    rule 4 kick the nuts
    rule 5 know me
    rule 6 spike gloves
    rule 7 stay out of vegas
    rule 8 dead zombie is good zombie
    rule 9 ax-47
    rule 10 dont ba a noob

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